There has been so much that has happened over the past few months, but we will try to keep it short and just capture the highlights. God is so compassionate and sweet, even in the midst of sleepless nights and heartache.
One new connection here in Memphis is with TN Kid’s Belong and it has been such a blessing to come alongside Katie and the ministry that they are doing here. A piece of that ministry is to film videos of children in the foster care system who have had what is called their TPR (Termination of Parental Rights) and have no prospects for adoption. These videos are usually for teenagers who have been in the system for a longer amount of time. Kid’s Belong has a high success rate of matching interested adoptive parents who are able to see sweet faces and incredible personalities! They actually have already matched three of the kids since the videos were release a few days ago! Richard was able to help out at the video shoot, getting to know the kids and helping to put them at ease. One of their favorite things to do was to play video games! There were two of the boys, Tyler and Joseph, who Richard spent the most time with and it was amazing to see how fast they warmed up. Our hearts broke for Tyler, when we found out that it was the 2nd video that he was filming, still looking to be taken in by a family. Both of them live at a large group home a few miles from our house where Richard does mentoring, but it is never a replacement for a family to come home to. Please join us in praying for both of them by name and for the many teenagers who will end up aging out of the system and never having a family to call there own. (Joseph’s Video: https://americaskidsbelong.org/project/joseph-3/and Tyler’s Video: https://americaskidsbelong.org/project/tyler-3/ )
Leilani and Santiago have been learning about budgeting over the past few years and set aside a giving jar. You might remember that they went to a local grocery store a year ago to pay for a few people's groceries. Well, this year they decided that they wanted to buy groceries for two different foster families that we have been in contact with. It was so beautiful to see their willingness to give to others and they were so excited checking everything off their shopping lists!
At the end of January, we received a big ice and snow storm here in Memphis. We were one of the lucky ones and only lost power for 24 hours, while other families had electricity out for over a week. Thankfully, we have a gas fireplace and a gas grill on the back porch, so we were able to have the neighborhood kids over to warm up in front of the fireplace and invite the neighbors over for dinner. We had never tried baked potatoes on the grill, but they turned out great! Over the next few days, the roads were still closed due to all of the fallen tree limbs, so we were able to be the “sleepover house” for our neighborhood kids who still didn’t have electricity. It made life interesting for a few days, but the snowmen turned out perfect!
In February, we were asked if we could foster two girls in our home who were from Honduras and Guatemala who didn’t speak English, but we still were not fully approved to be able to accept them. A few weeks later, Ximena was approached to help out with a quinceañera for the same two girls! There are only a few Latino foster families in Memphis, so they had been living with an elderly lady who doesn’t speak Spanish or understand Latino culture. Both girls had the same exact birthday, so Ximena teamed up with Charmai and Amy to celebrate their lives and this special 15th birthday. Ximena was in charge of the food, so she started calling a few of the Panaderias here locally to get a cake made and she contacted J’s grandmother, since she is from Honduras, to have her help cook some food so that it would feel like home. It was a little chaotic at the end with Ximena even getting lost somewhere in Memphis, but all of the pieces came together. The most special part was when Ximena was able to pray for both of the girls and their families, praying blessings over their lives and bringing tears to their eyes. One of the girls has been reunited with an aunt in Ohio and the other girl is still in foster care. Please join us in praying for more Spanish-speaking families to become foster parents, because it is such a need here in Memphis!
On that note, we have been officially approved to foster! Actually, as I write this, we have a final meeting in a few minutes with DCS. We are excited to see how we can join alongside the work that God is doing here in Memphis and love on those children He brings into our home. It has been a long process and we have jumped through so many hoops. We know that this will continue with each child that we take in, but it sure is nice to be done with a few of those steps! The kids keep asking when we will be receiving our first placement, because they are excited to meet him or her...let's see!
Richard has continued his classes in Chicago to become a spiritual director through Moody. It is crazy to think that it has already been almost two years of travel to and from Chicago, but the end of April will be his last in-person weekend class. As a part of the requirements, he needed to provide 20 hours of supervised spiritual direction. It was beautiful to see how God guided and directed him, placing three men on his heart to walk alongside starting back in November. The interesting part is that they are all in different countries, one here locally, one in Kenya, and one in Ecuador! It has been sweet to see how God is working on their lives and their openness to growth and change. Richard is looking forward in the future to providing spiritual direction to foster dads here in Memphis as well.
Both of us were also surprised by having close friends and family invite us on trips. This winter had been hard with a lot more snow and ice than we are used to. Also, J has been sick almost 3 weeks out of every month. Ximena was invited by Claire to go to her favorite place on earth, and it was obviously to warm weather! It was just for a weekend trip, but Ximena came back energized and a little tanner. Richard had been planning a trip ever since college with his cousin, Britt. As soon as she booked her ticket, Richard did too! His trip was a lot colder and filled with ice and snow, but it was a really fun time together.
While Richard was gone, J’s “Hulk” side came out! J had actually been doing really well, sleeping through the night, only having a few break-downs a day, and was generally pleasant to be around. He still had a few trauma behaviors that we were correcting, but nothing too big. As soon as Richard left, he flipped it into “full-steam ahead” mode! He was waking up at 1 am and staying awake until 5 am, screaming, escaping, and not letting anyone sleep. It was so sad to see how Richard’s absence could trigger his trauma so much, leading to such unhealthy behavior. Since Richard’s been back, it hasn’t changed and we are still working on it. J will do whatever he can to not sleep on his bed, showing his defiance by trying to come downstairs to sleep on the couch or a chair that was in his room. So we are still in the struggle! But thankfully, J did receive Richard really well when he came back, which was such a healthy behavior.
We were also able to have baby C (who we call Taquito), J’s half-brother, over for the weekend during spring break. It was the first time that they had spent time together in a few months. It was so sweet to see how J interacted with Taquito and immediately took on that big brother role. At the same time, he definitely showed his jealousy! Since Taquito was receiving more attention, J would try to crawl into our laps and didn’t want us to hold Taquito as much. So there were a few extra tantrums, but it was a sweet time. We were also able to take Taquito for his first haircut! He was enthralled with the sound of the trimmer and kept trying to watch it, but thankfully it all went well. We are hoping to begin having Taquito over more often to be able to have the brothers spend time together. In reflecting on this, we realized that we have been involved with M, J, and Baby C for over a year! We met them in February and they moved in with us the first few days of April. It’s been a wild ride!
If you could please join us in praying, we would greatly appreciate it!!!
1. Foster Placements: Please pray for wisdom on who to receive and who not to receive into our home. We know there is a big need, but also don’t want to become overloaded and burnt out.
2. J: We had court the end of January, but nothing happened. His next court date is the end of May, which we were told is now an official trial. Please be praying for the judge to make wise decisions, for M to take healthy steps to getting her kids back, as well as wisdom for us as we work with J through his trauma.
3. Health: We have all been through a lot of sickness, especially J. Please pray for continued health, as well as Ximena as allergy season in Memphis starts.
4. Family: Please continue to pray for Mayumi and her pregnancy. She is almost 6 months pregnant and is expecting a boy! Also, both Inti and Nico took the TOEFL tests to potentially come and study university in the US. They both passed with great scores! Please pray for wisdom in these next steps.
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